Your Light Will Come
I remember when all I could do was lie in bed. I remember the days that each breath I took hurt so much that I’d hope it was my last. I remember the day that I shut my family out. I remember when I needed to be helped being bathed and clothed. I remember the day when I had my eyes open and then in an instant, I saw “nothingness”. I remember the night when I turned off the light and waited for my eyes to adjust only to find that I could only see total blackness.
I remember the months when I feared the dark for I knew that for hours I would not be able to see anything. I remember the days when I spoke I always stuttered. I remember the day my sweetheart came home to find me on the floor for hours on end. I remember the days that I could not open a bag of chips. I remember the day when I decided to make myself dinner only to break the dish in a million pieces. I remember the days when I was not allowed to handle any breakable items because of the uncontrollable shaking of my arms. I remember the days when I felt that I was all alone. I remember the day when I had enough strength to go to the mailbox. I remember that day when the little neighbor girl saw me and said, “I can get that for you”. I remember the day when I was asked by one of the little ones, “Do you have AIDS?” I remember also being asked, “Do you have cancer?” I remember the days when I tried to continue to work and being asked that I not come back for I was scaring the children. I remember the days when I was able to go grocery shopping and had to call a friend because I forgot how to get home. ….
Now, these are my days. I wake up tired but excited that I can walk. Excited to be alive, excited that I can see, excited that I can hear, excited that I can shower, excited that I can make myself something to eat, excited that I can clean the house, excited that I can do the dishes, excited that I can sit at my computer and type, excited that I can look out at such a beautiful view, excited that I can give my sweetheart a hug, excited that I can lift my poochie and cuddle with her, excited that I have friends that I can call friends, excited that I let my family be part of this, excited that I can shovel, excited that I can go to town and not get lost, excited to be able to see, hear, touch, smell, and taste all the beautiful things in this world. The list is endless; I’m excited about life–so much to be excited about…
For those of you that are having a difficult time right now, you will be able to see the rainbows, the sunshine and blue skies, the light at the end of the light at the end of the tunnel. For you are champions, you will not be beat unless you give up.
Inspiration: